A Great Endorsement!

J. S. sent the following comment in response to the column in my September newsletter:

This was a great read, Lucy. Fascinating and informative. Thx. A friend of mine, her hubby could never fly and he went to a hypnotherapist w/ great success. It definitely works. I let go of 55 exces lbs that way too!!

Thanks so much for writing, J.S.  I love hearing mind-body success stories!

In Today's Email

Nearly ten years later, I still listen to your tapes, but they are entirely shot! I’m dealing with some challenges right now and was hoping to come in for a session or two and upgrade to CDs.

It was good to hear from "Betty" again. I love that she's been benefitting from the hypnotherapy tapes I made for her so many years ago and that she thought of me now that she needs some help once again.

People often ask me if the results of my work are permanent. Well, yes and no. My work helps create a solid foundation of wellness that lasts. At the same time, our challenges may change as we age and grow and sometimes that foundation needs to be tweaked to meet those new challenges.

Argh!

Obviously none of us in the 6 am Bikram class is working as hard as R. Otherwise, why would the rest of us be so silent? Especially during final savassana.

Breathe, Lucy, breathe.

It cracks me up when people say to me,"Oh, you must be so calm all the time with the work you do." Hah! Those people should have seen me stomping out of class this morning, seething with resentment and dripping with judgment.

I do recognize that R is a good teacher for me. I should be able to tune him out and just go about my business in total peace and serenity.

Well, it's not happening that way.

Good Stress

Our daughter's boyfriend proposed to her last week and now she is engaged. My husband and I are beyond thrilled.

We are also really goofy. Last night my husband walked around the entire house looking for a bottle top that ended up being in his hand the whole time. This is my usually grounded-like-a-rock husband.

This morning in my Bikram Yoga class I caught myself in the the wrong posture, totally out of sync with the rest of the class because my mind had drifted to plans for a family party we'll be hosting in a few weeks.

I keep having to pull my breath down out of my upper chest into my belly. My daily Vimala Alphabet practice is showing some weird patterns that I have to stop and fix as I write.

It occurs to me that this wonderful development in our lives has activated the ancient fight-or-flight response that's usually associated with bad things, not good ones. This good-stress factor kind of sneaked up on me, but now that I'm aware of it, I am doing my best to address it the same way as I teach my anxious clients to address theirs:

1. Take a deep, deep breath! Make sure I'm breathing in through my nose every time and doing my best to draw the breath all the way down into my belly.

2. Pay attention to grounding myself. I like to imagine roots coming down through the soles of my feet and into the earth.

3. Go to bed earlier -- in case my brain wakes up at 3 am (as it has done a few times already) and decides to walk me through all the details it thinks I need to be aware of right then and there.

4. Pay attention to the direction of my thoughts. What is it about wedding plans that generate catastrophic thinking?

5. Write everything down. At least one comic incident illustrated quite clearly that our minds cannot be trusted to hold new information.

6. Remember to laugh!

7. As much as possible, keep JOY as the launching pad for any and all planning. It's all too easy to get sucked into should's that rob me of my perspective, my energy and my sense of self.

If you have anything to add to my list, please comment. I plan to post updates as we go through the days counting down to October 6, 2012. What fun!

Relax!

My absolutely favorite part of yoga is final savassana. The reward at the end of 90 minutes of torture. I crawl to it. I luxuriate in it.

Well, this morning I was just drifting into that delicious la-la-land place when I hear such moaning and groaning, huffing and puffing. Someone must have been rolling a boulder up a mountain, it was so loud.

I pull off my wash cloth/eye pillow and look to see what the heck is going on. Of course, it's "R" all the way across the room. "R" is getting up from his savassana. "R" is pulling his shirt on. That's all. Just "R." "R" who was reprimanded for checking text messages between postures the other day. "R" who can't do anything and still sets himself up in the front row. "R." "R" who has been pushing my buttons since he started coming to 6 am yoga class a few weeks ago.

First I just glared. Nothing. Of course, he has no awareness of anything but himself. Then I felt a roll of anger so red, so hot, that I had to get up. I went out and told the yoga instructor that she had to say something to him about how disruptive he is. She was a little startled because no one in yoga would guess that I could be angry – especially that angry. She smiled. I left.

And then of course he pulls up behind me at the first stop light. And he knows it's me that tattled on him. I refuse to look at him. And then he's next to me at the next stoplight. I refuse to look at him, but I just know he has this little kicked-puppy look.

By the time I got home I felt like such a jerk because obviously he just doesn't know any better. I felt so unkind in my judgment of him, in my refusal to look at him. And wondering why I let him push my buttons so.

The Declaration of the Letter Dd is, "The cause of any upset is never outside of myself." Obviously I need to write some Dd's today.

I Hate No-Shows!

Okay, I admit it: no-shows make me cranky. There I am, in my office, candle lit, mentally and spiritually prepared to work and ... no client.

The minutes tick by. I check my office voicemail, no messages. I check the hallway outside my office, no one. I call the client and the call goes straight to voicemail. I hold the intention that the client is okay. Sometimes I don't get a return call for days afterward and I'm left wondering if something terrible has happened. Occasionally it is something terrible but most of the time it's simply a case of "I forgot."

In the Agreement each client signs at the first session, there is a clause in red that I ask the person to initial. This clause specifies that I charge for any session they miss without giving me 24-hours notice. No exceptions. If someone is ill or has car trouble or something like that, I offer a phone session during the appointment time. I point this out verbally to clients as well and there's never any question.

That is, until they miss a session. Some clients immediately offer to pay for the session. Most get annoyed when I mention the missed session fee. I know that I've lost clients over this because once they pay for the missed session they have not rescheduled.

Have I mentioned that I hate no-shows?

Pre-Surgery Sessions Work!

Received from a client:

Surgery went as scripted. Not a drop of blood on the bandages when I removed them this morning and there is no bruising! I am waiting for lab results and to make a follow-up appointment, but so far could not have gone better. Thank you.

The "script" for this woman's surgery included a hypnotherapy CD I made for her with specific suggestions for her body's reaction before, during and after surgery. The bottom line was that she went in calmly, the surgery went smoothly, and her recovery was rapid and complete.

The "no bruising" is only one of the great side-effects of pre-surgery hypnotherapy!

Everything in my life is a gift ...

A colleague I particularly respect sent me the following email:

My talk was to [an association] – couldn’t believe how nervous I was, inspite of how often I do this. It think, because of my counseling background and wanting to speak especially to their particular needs, my stomach acted up a lot and I felt weak-kneed – how embarrassing; finally pulled out of it by simply telling them that I was nervous! HA!

My response to her was:

I find that experiences such as the one you describe help to keep us connected to what our clients are going through. It expands compassion and deepens understanding, ultimately making us better at what we do.

Tied Up In Knots

Most of my clients just don't get the benefit of the handwriting work I do. They balk at the idea of making changes to their handwriting and dismiss the transformational value of a daily handwriting practice.

I'd been working with "Hermine" for several months. We had a few intense sessions in my office, and then, because of the distance between us, we followed-up with weekly TAT sessions over the phone. Once in a while, in response to the TAT sessions, I recorded a new hypnotherapy CD for her and mailed it.

For the past four years, Hermine has dealt with a phobia that's manifesting as a physical condition. As with most phobias, this one is anxiety-based and the result of a hyper-vigilant response to a perceived danger.

For a number of reasons (that now leave me scratching my head) I did not initially ask for a handwriting sample from Hermine. As our phone work was not yielding the dramatic results I would have expected given the consistency of the sessions and Hermine's motivation to heal, I asked her to mail me a page of her writing.

The capital H in her autograph looked like a maze. There were little loops everywhere, especially in the upper left hand corner where she began the letter. I compared this autograph with the one on her initial consultation agreement and there was a huge difference. The H in the current autograph was significantly loopier.

When I questioned Hermine about this, she said that the sample she had sent me was representative of her usual autograph. She mentioned how much she loves the way the H in her name looks with all the loops.

I asked her if she'd be willing to take on a daily handwriting practice, focusing on the capital H in of The Vimala Alphabet which is simple and dynamic. The only loop is in a "tie stroke" that projects positive energy in one's day-to-day activities. She was less than thrilled but said she'd be willing to try anything if it would help.

We then proceeded with a TAT session.

Because of holidays, our next phone session was two weeks later. I had received a new handwriting sample from Hermine from her now-daily practice and her H's were beautiful. As we caught up, she mentioned that our last TAT session must have been particularly powerful because she had been doing much better since then. The grip of the phobia had loosened and she was less anxious overall.

I pointed out that she had been working on her handwriting since the last TAT session and suggested that it was her new H that had made the difference. The old H had been reflective of Hermine's long-standing subconscious tendency to "tie herself up in knots." The more work we did to loosen those tendencies, the tighter and more plentiful the knots became as the subconscious held on to its old, familiar, "secure" ways.

Hermine's experience was as significant for me as it was for her. It is a perfect example of why the handwriting work is foundational and essential. For more information, check out Vimala Rodgers' websites: http://www.alphabeticalblessings.com/ and http://www.iihs.com/. Sign up for Dr. Rodgers' weekly e-letter. It's free!

Essential Healing

Essential Healing is the name I've given to a wonderful interactive hypnotherapy technique I've perfected over the years. I developed Essential Healing from the awareness that when the subconscious adopts a specific behavior, it thinks it's being of service. The ability to speak directly with the part in charge of a specific behavior (i.e., night eating, procrastination, self-sabotage, etc.) opens up invaluable avenues of information and healing.

I love Essential Healing sessions and had the opportunity to do one yesterday. The client not only accessed her Inner Wisdom, but also the part in charge of a behavioral pattern that has been increasingly in her way and quite baffling to her. The client got a clear picture of the exact time in her life when this part (and the behavior) first joined her. Then we worked with the client's Problem-Solving Mind to come up with three healthy, new ways for that part to be of service, immediately replacing the unpleasant pattern in place for many years. The client was stunned by the clarity of information she received, and the beautiful flow of the session. As a strong woman, I also think she appreciated the fact that all of the answers came directly from her -- from different parts of her powerful mind and being -- and that she received a spiritual boost, as well.

Essential Healing is my signature hypnotherapy technique, one that I taught for nine years at Marilyn Gordon's Center for Hypnotherapy Certification. Not every hypnotherapist is comfortable doing this kind of deep, transformational work. It takes experience, patience and great care. What a privilege it is for me to facilitate such marvelous healing experiences for people!

The Time to Heal

Yesterday I started working with a new client, a 26-year-old man who's suffered from some level of anxiety most of his life. Even though he's seen counselors and even a psychiatrist, he had no idea what what the disconnect was between mind and body that has been causing the panic attacks, jitteriness, digestive problems, etc.

He responded so quickly and beautifully to the diaphragmatic breathing I taught him, and then to the custom relaxation CD I made for him. There was a huge difference in him over the 90 minutes we spent together.

I know he'll do his homework (practice the breathing technique and listen to his CD daily) because he's wonderfully motivated to be completely well.

What a great experience for us both! Looking forward to our next session.

Debunking New British Infertility Study

What are those Brits thinking?

In USA Weekend yesterday, there was an article on "New Thinking in Infertility" reporting findings from the British Medical Journal that I totally disagree with.

Apparently a new study found that there was no difference in the successful pregnancy rates of women who are under lots of stress versus women who aren't. This just doesn't make any sense! The physiological domino effect of stress in the body contradicts that finding and leaves me scratching my head.

Very simply put, stress puts us into fight-or-flight response. That fight-or-flight response includes a disruption in the production of hormones that support conception and pregnancy.

Establishing a relaxation response is key to conception and full-term pregnancy. Forget the British study; I've got case files full of proof of how effective the mind-body-spirit connection is this regard.

Asking for Help

I work with a lot of very strong people. Some of my clients have never before asked for help and their call to my office creates its own anxiety.

Many people have a chip on their shoulder about asking for help and accepting it when it's offered. They say they feel weak if they ask for help and strong when they tackle their problems on their own or just pretend those problems don't exist at all.

I see it differently. I see the strength in asking for help and accepting it. I see the courage it takes to admit that you're only human after all and don't have all the answers. Yes, it is a vulnerable position to place oneself in. And in that vulnerability is an opening for the Light to shine in and do its most sacred work.

Change in Plans

I have taken the Summer Solstice Celebration (originally scheduled for Tuesday, June 21st) off my calendar because it turns out that I have another commitment that evening.

This is a perfect example of how busy our lives can get and how challenging it sometimes is to keep all the areas of our lives straight.

I belong to an Armenian women's organization (The Daughters of Vartan). The San Francisco chapter is hosting a national Convocation in July and the planning committee has been working for over a year to make it all happen successfully. One of the many hats I'm wearing as part of this huge endeavor, is as narrator of a special Saturday night banquet program. This requires several rehearsals, one of which is Tuesday, June 21st.

At first I thought of rescheduling the workshop for a day before or after. And then sanity asserted itself and I realized that I had enough on my plate until the Convocation... and perhaps a few weeks after.

What surprises me is the resistance I had to making this decision in favor of allowing some open space in my life. I felt guilty and somehow irresponsible. How weird is that?

Does this type of thing show up in your life too?

Successful Surgery!

Well, the surgery went perfectly. There was very little bleeding and it took much less time than he thought it would. Your therapy helped tremendously, as I knew it would.

M.F.

This is a post-surgery note from a client. Getting A Higher Perspective on an upcoming surgery sets you up for less anxiety before the procedure, a smoother flow to the procedure itself and less bruising and faster recovery afterward.

A Request from Dr. Masuro Emoto

It's been a very long time since I added to this blog. I've been busy! I just received a message from a dear lady that deserves widespread recognition. It was written by Dr. Masuro Emoto, the gentle soul behind The Hidden Messages in Water: To All People Around the World, Please send your prayers of love and gratitude to water at the nuclear plants in Fukushima, Japan! By the massive earthquakes of Magnitude 9 and surreal massive tsunamis, more than 10,000 people are still missing…even now… It has been 16 days already since the disaster happened. What makes it worse is that water at the reactors of Fukushima Nuclear Plants started to leak, and it’s contaminating the ocean, air and water molecule of surrounding areas. Human wisdom has not been able to do much to solve the problem, but we are only trying to cool down the anger of radioactive materials in the reactors by discharging water to them. Is there really nothing else to do? I think there is. During over twenty year research of hado measuring and water crystal photographic technology, I have been witnessing that water can turn positive when it receives pure vibration of human prayer no matter how far away it is. Energy formula of Albert Einstein, E=MC2 really means that Energy = number of people and the square of people’s consciousness. Now is the time to understand the true meaning. Let us all join the prayer ceremony as fellow citizens of the planet earth. I would like to ask all people, not just in Japan, but all around the world to please help us to find a way out the crisis of this planet!! The prayer procedure is as follows. Day and Time: March 31st, 2011 (Thursday) 12:00 noon in each time zone Please say the following phrase: “The water of Fukushima Nuclear Plant, we are sorry to make you suffer. Please forgive us. We thank you, and we love you.” Please say it aloud or in your mind. Repeat it three times as you put your hands together in a prayer position. Please offer your sincere prayer. Thank you very much from my heart. With love and gratitude, Masaru Emoto Messenger of Water http://emotopeaceproject.blogspot.com/

A Call to Kindness

I've received some wonderful feedback on my February newsletter column.

M.F. is posting it on her refrigerator and wants to make it a family project.

P.W. writes, "Happy February! How are you? I like the Call to Kindness! I'm on board. I suggest adding the other half to the next to last bullet: Listen to others thoughtfully and respectfully when they express their thoughts and opinions."

What a great addition to the list. Thanks to all who wrote with your support.

Spiritual Diplomatic Passport

I don't know about you, but sometimes I get very huffy about having to face difficult life situations. Good grief, we're on a spiritual path, we're enlightened, conscious beings – shouldn't we get a pass on challenging lessons? Does my soul REALLY need this experience to grow? Yeah, right, whatever ... This "spiritual yoga," pulling and stretching us beyond our imagined capacity, can be exhausting.

Practicing Kindness

I've been working on my February newsletter column most of this week. Some months the column just flows out of my fingertips. Not this time. I've written and re-written numerous times until last night I refused to read it one more time before sending all the newsletter components to my wonderful web administrator, Lisa Keene.

The column is called "A Call to Kindness." In it, I am laying out a February challenge for myself and for my readers to refrain from any and all forms of nastiness throughout the month. I should have written something about this being a moment-by-moment practice because it's not even February yet and I'm already struggling with this.

This morning it was hard for me to get out of bed for yoga at 5:30. I was tired and cranky. When I arrived, I had a flash of disappointment and irritation. There was this very new instructor who is soft-spoken and conducts the class as though she's reciting a script by heart -- which may well be the case. She doesn't unlock the studio doors until the first student arrives so maybe she's as ill at ease with life in general as she is as a teacher.

I really dragged myself through class today. She's a very sweet woman, but totally unmotivating. As I lay in final savasana, my mind was buzzing with negativity and some rather unkind judgments. Remembering my intentions, and realizing how badly I'd fallen short of keeping them, I was ashamed of myself.

The instructor was folding towels as I was putting on my sweatshirt and shoes in the studio lobby. I scrambled for something positive to say, just to stem the tide of my own negative thoughts. "You are getting more confident." She lit up and her ever-present smile broadened. "Yes, she said. "Seeing you and Nancy (another "regular" about my age) makes me feel comfortable and helps me do better."

My heart energy shifted as my expanded. Yes, kindness. I like it.

EFT to the Rescue!

A few weeks ago I gave a free EFT introduction at the Women's Health Center in Walnut Creek. One of the participants sent me this note afterward:


"I want to share with you that the night I got back from the EFT class I introduced MIA to do EFT on an issue she has been having for the past 2 years with one of my nieces that goes to the same high school...(long story) MIA has gone thru stress about her so we did EFT together, did it around 4 times. Amazinglyyy!!! she did shift!!... she woke up the next day and surprised me of her reasoning. It has been the greates shift EVER!. MIA is now doing EFT at school when she needs to...she shared with me...Mama...I went to the restroom to do EFT on a situation I had at school and I feel great!. We have been also doing EFT when she is overwhelmed with so much school work and amazingly!! she says she feels motivated and capable to handle the work.

Just wanted to share that with you."

This is reprinted with permission; MIA is not her real name.

I did it!

I just finished the first of a series of webinars with Tapas Fleming. "Practicing Presence" is a requirement of my certification process as a TAT Practitioner.

To participate in the class, I had to purchase a webcam and learn how to use it. It seemed daunting, but was remarkably, relatively simple. I have to admit that the biggest hurdle was my own resistance to the whole process. I hated the whole idea of a virtual gathering and judged it to be cold and undesirable.

Imagine my surprise as I found myself enjoying the opportunity to connect with people all over the world -- to see and hear them.

How many other places in my life am I holding myself back with these ungrounded opinions?