Excerpt from my letter to Gary Craig, creator of The Emotional Freedom Technique:
Dear Gary,
When I took your training at Marilyn Gordon's Hypnotherapy Center on May 3, 1998, I had no idea it would be a life-changing event. Your work has been an integral part of my work ever since. I have been particularly proud to share your extraordinary integrity, humility and compassion each time I introduce EFT to a new client or audience.
Your decision to retire brought tears to my eyes. There are no words to express my gratitude for who you are and all you've done.
With blessings, love and light,
Lucy Grace
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Monday, November 30, 2009
Trust In the Moment
In all the work I've done with the Vimala System of Handwriting, in the teachings of Nara White Owl, in my dabblings with astrology, and all the other esoteric studies sprinkled throughout the past twenty years of my life, the theme of "learning our lessons" is a single, unifying thread.
From what I can see, the lesson these days is TRUST; trust that there is an overall movement toward the good in this Universe. Staying in the moment is a direct path to staying in trust. As has been pointed out again and again across millennia, across philosophical and religious lines, this moment, moment by moment, is really all we have.
The promise of sanctuary lives in this moment. Beyond this moment is the chaos of uncertainty and the fear that brings.
We are at the forefront of a new paradigm. Life has never been like this before. We look ahead and it seems as if all the possible paths are blocked off. The heart starts to hammer and anxiety ratchets up. Anxiety is an excellent fertilizer for worry and as the brain becomes more and more full of worry, creative thought is squeezed out. Our focus narrows down to all the things great and small that are not working in our lives. The spiral that invites us upward in spirit ends up screwing us down into a dark, sticky abyss.
The problem is not a paucity of options, but a limited scope of vision. I’m sure of it.
From what I can see, the lesson these days is TRUST; trust that there is an overall movement toward the good in this Universe. Staying in the moment is a direct path to staying in trust. As has been pointed out again and again across millennia, across philosophical and religious lines, this moment, moment by moment, is really all we have.
The promise of sanctuary lives in this moment. Beyond this moment is the chaos of uncertainty and the fear that brings.
We are at the forefront of a new paradigm. Life has never been like this before. We look ahead and it seems as if all the possible paths are blocked off. The heart starts to hammer and anxiety ratchets up. Anxiety is an excellent fertilizer for worry and as the brain becomes more and more full of worry, creative thought is squeezed out. Our focus narrows down to all the things great and small that are not working in our lives. The spiral that invites us upward in spirit ends up screwing us down into a dark, sticky abyss.
The problem is not a paucity of options, but a limited scope of vision. I’m sure of it.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Long time no write!
What a time it's been! For my clients, friends and self, the past couple of months have been unusually intense. I have responded by easing up on my commitments, including this blog. Instead, I have allowed myself more mindless pursuits like finishing up the season of "Mad Men" and the latest episode of "The Good Wife." It's been incredibly satisfying to watch certain shows whose turmoil only lasts 44 minutes or so before being neatly and happily resolved.
Last Friday, November 13, my husband and I had just merged onto 101 from 128 on our way back from a much-needed vacation in Mendocino. I still don't know what came over me, but I turned to him and said something like: "It feels as though something significant has shifted. I don't know why or how, but it's huge -- like tectonic plates shifting. I know it sounds really weird, but I feel suddenly as though our world has changed somehow and life will never be the same."
When we arrived home, we heard of three deaths that had taken place over the few days we had been away. One was a 6-year-old girl in Oakland who had been born with cancerous melanomas, one was the cherished 22-year-old son of my Alphabetical Sister, Robin in Rhode Island, and one was a man in his 50's in the San Fernando Valley, the father of one of my kids' friends. All the services had been completed for these dear ones. Since January, I have attended 6 funerals of people who were each precious to me.
There is no doubt that our resilience muscles are being toned. There is no doubt that uncertainty is one of our few certainties. I can only hold fast to the hands of my Guides and Angels and trust them to keep me going in the right direction.
Last Friday, November 13, my husband and I had just merged onto 101 from 128 on our way back from a much-needed vacation in Mendocino. I still don't know what came over me, but I turned to him and said something like: "It feels as though something significant has shifted. I don't know why or how, but it's huge -- like tectonic plates shifting. I know it sounds really weird, but I feel suddenly as though our world has changed somehow and life will never be the same."
When we arrived home, we heard of three deaths that had taken place over the few days we had been away. One was a 6-year-old girl in Oakland who had been born with cancerous melanomas, one was the cherished 22-year-old son of my Alphabetical Sister, Robin in Rhode Island, and one was a man in his 50's in the San Fernando Valley, the father of one of my kids' friends. All the services had been completed for these dear ones. Since January, I have attended 6 funerals of people who were each precious to me.
There is no doubt that our resilience muscles are being toned. There is no doubt that uncertainty is one of our few certainties. I can only hold fast to the hands of my Guides and Angels and trust them to keep me going in the right direction.
How does hypnotherapy work for weight management?
"Natasha" wrote the following note some weeks after her third session with me. I have made some edits to make reading the message easier but the content is all hers:
Wow, life is great. I lost 9 lbs to date almost effort less since 9/2. I love my husband and his words don't hurt me as often. I also don't put myself in a position of being hurt because now I trust my decisions and don't look for confirmation as much. I say to myself before I go to him, if I don't get the affirmation from him that I am hoping for then 1) is he being an ass? 2) does he have to believe as I do? Usually No. 3) is he capable of the feelings I am hoping for?
Walking through these questions first when I head into an emotional discussion allows me to still love him for who he is and then I can still be who I am. So far this has been very freeing.
I do the same with my best friend who is similar to [my husband].
For eating, I eat a healthy breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I sometimes have a 10am and/or 4pm snack. I only weighed myself three times so far because I am in tune with my emotions and healthy eating. When I eat unhealthy, I am not really enjoying it. Not sure why right now, but I don't need to know.
Wow, life is great. I lost 9 lbs to date almost effort less since 9/2. I love my husband and his words don't hurt me as often. I also don't put myself in a position of being hurt because now I trust my decisions and don't look for confirmation as much. I say to myself before I go to him, if I don't get the affirmation from him that I am hoping for then 1) is he being an ass? 2) does he have to believe as I do? Usually No. 3) is he capable of the feelings I am hoping for?
Walking through these questions first when I head into an emotional discussion allows me to still love him for who he is and then I can still be who I am. So far this has been very freeing.
I do the same with my best friend who is similar to [my husband].
For eating, I eat a healthy breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I sometimes have a 10am and/or 4pm snack. I only weighed myself three times so far because I am in tune with my emotions and healthy eating. When I eat unhealthy, I am not really enjoying it. Not sure why right now, but I don't need to know.
Friday, October 16, 2009
She did it!
"Elaine" was in on Wednesday. She was almost in tears at the thought of driving her daughter from Danville to a class in Lafayette that afternoon. "Perfect!" I said.
We took it step by step: leaving the house, driving through the town streets to the freeway entrance, onto the freeway, then exit by exit to the 680/24 split, the dreaded overpass, and finally to the Pleasant Hill Exit. For nearly the full 90-minutes of our session, we tapped. By the end of the session, she was able to go through the entire route in her mind without fear.
As she was leaving, I asked her to email or call me to let me know how the actual drive went. When I hadn't heard from her by Thursday afternoon, I called her. Had it gone so badly that she was too disappointed to call?
Nope. Turns out that it went so well that she forgot it had been a big deal to begin with, forgot her promise to check-in with me. When I reminded her how frightened she had been, she turned sheepish. It was hard for her to relate to the intensity of the fear she'd experienced for so many years after such an effortless drive.
And that, folks, is exactly how it's supposed to work.
We took it step by step: leaving the house, driving through the town streets to the freeway entrance, onto the freeway, then exit by exit to the 680/24 split, the dreaded overpass, and finally to the Pleasant Hill Exit. For nearly the full 90-minutes of our session, we tapped. By the end of the session, she was able to go through the entire route in her mind without fear.
As she was leaving, I asked her to email or call me to let me know how the actual drive went. When I hadn't heard from her by Thursday afternoon, I called her. Had it gone so badly that she was too disappointed to call?
Nope. Turns out that it went so well that she forgot it had been a big deal to begin with, forgot her promise to check-in with me. When I reminded her how frightened she had been, she turned sheepish. It was hard for her to relate to the intensity of the fear she'd experienced for so many years after such an effortless drive.
And that, folks, is exactly how it's supposed to work.
Monday, October 12, 2009
How much do you charge?
In my circles of friends and colleagues, it's common to speak in terms of "an exchange of energy" when describing the collection of fees for services rendered.
Setting fees has been problematic for me from the very first client I saw, nearly 18 years ago. How does one put a monetary value on one's skills? On healing? On wellness?
When I say I have a "sliding scale," some people are puzzled by the phrase. It means that my fees are adjustable, according to the client's financial situation.
Some years ago, there was one troubled man I saw over a period of several months. He was a referral from Dr. Len Saputo of the Health Medicine Institute and because of debilitating back pain, could only work part-time. Dr. Saputo was using photon light therapy on him and although there was some improvement from that, Dr. Saputo astutely figured that there must be emotional components to the pain that prevented the complete "cure" possible. I offered to see "Jim" at $25 per visit. He was fearless in our work together, never refusing to go into what I think of as the "tender places" in order to heal. As he got better and better, he was able to work more. I realize that I expected him to offer to increase his weekly payment to me as his financial situation improved. When that didn't happen, I understood how naive I'd been in my expectation.
I'm better at setting those boundaries these days. As important as it is for to me to be of service when I can, and to price those services to be accessible, I know it is also up to me to ask for what I feel those services are worth. People who don't blink at dropping hundreds of dollars for a single dinner at a fine restaurant put up all kinds of resistance when asked to pay my full fee. Sometimes I can laugh about. Sometimes.
Setting fees has been problematic for me from the very first client I saw, nearly 18 years ago. How does one put a monetary value on one's skills? On healing? On wellness?
When I say I have a "sliding scale," some people are puzzled by the phrase. It means that my fees are adjustable, according to the client's financial situation.
Some years ago, there was one troubled man I saw over a period of several months. He was a referral from Dr. Len Saputo of the Health Medicine Institute and because of debilitating back pain, could only work part-time. Dr. Saputo was using photon light therapy on him and although there was some improvement from that, Dr. Saputo astutely figured that there must be emotional components to the pain that prevented the complete "cure" possible. I offered to see "Jim" at $25 per visit. He was fearless in our work together, never refusing to go into what I think of as the "tender places" in order to heal. As he got better and better, he was able to work more. I realize that I expected him to offer to increase his weekly payment to me as his financial situation improved. When that didn't happen, I understood how naive I'd been in my expectation.
I'm better at setting those boundaries these days. As important as it is for to me to be of service when I can, and to price those services to be accessible, I know it is also up to me to ask for what I feel those services are worth. People who don't blink at dropping hundreds of dollars for a single dinner at a fine restaurant put up all kinds of resistance when asked to pay my full fee. Sometimes I can laugh about. Sometimes.
These are the days of miracle and wonder ...
My newsletter column this month was about two quirks of the subconscious mind: one, that it can't tell the difference between what's real and what's imagined; two, that it has no sense of time.
One of my clients commented that as logical as that second quirk sounds, she found it impossible to believe that "It's never too late to have a happy childhood." She offered the analogy of an amputation, asserting that once the limb is gone, it's gone forever and the impact of that injury must be dealt with every day.
I explained that the work we were doing together made the difference between the ability to live life feeling healthy and whole versus experiencing "phantom limb pain" for the rest of her days.
One of my clients commented that as logical as that second quirk sounds, she found it impossible to believe that "It's never too late to have a happy childhood." She offered the analogy of an amputation, asserting that once the limb is gone, it's gone forever and the impact of that injury must be dealt with every day.
I explained that the work we were doing together made the difference between the ability to live life feeling healthy and whole versus experiencing "phantom limb pain" for the rest of her days.
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