Marilyn Gordon is the director of the Center for Hypnotherapy Certification in Oakland. She has been my teacher, my mentor and my friend. She's also an excellent writer, with several books to her credit. Here is an article she recently wrote that is so good it makes me wish I had written it :-)
Here's a link for the article, which has been published on ezinearticles.com: http://bit.ly/9eY2bM
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
"Miranda's" First Session
"Miranda" came in yesterday.
Her handwriting told me that in spite of her wonderfully upbeat, positive attitude, something in her past was holding her subconscious attention. Her upper case F was facing backward and she was missing the lower loops of all the letters that should have lower loops. When I asked her to write the letter Yy with attention to the lower loop, the loop she did make was very slanted to the left (the past). Clearly she had some unresolved issues from the past that were impacting her present. She was refreshing in her eagerness to do whatever it takes to reach her goals. Many of my clients say they want things to change but chafe at making changes! Miranda was fine with beginning a daily handwriting practice, incorporating the changes I pointed out.
The downside to "positive thinking" is that people will tell themselves that a difficult situation is behind them and that they're "over it." But all they've done is push their real feelings away so that they "stay positive." Those real feelings of disappointment, grief, anger, etc., carve their initials into the subconscious and tend to become increasingly impactful on our minds and bodies. Dating Coach Jeannine Kaiser calls it, "Slapping a happy-face sticker over it." Miranda could feel the releasing and relaxing effects of the EFT as we tapped on a two-year-old experience.
The other thing we addressed was Miranda's difficulty in allowing her body to relax. A high-energy woman, she's constantly in Go! mode. Generally, when people lie down, they automatically move into a slow, easy diaphragmatic breathing. Even lying down, Miranda's breath was very rapid. We worked for a long time to anchor the therapeutic benefits of slow, rhythmic, diaphragmatic breathing into her body so she could practice it on her own.
Miranda was amazed at how much we packed into our time together and was surprised at how the quickly the minutes flew by. And people wonder why I schedule 90-minute sessions!
Her handwriting told me that in spite of her wonderfully upbeat, positive attitude, something in her past was holding her subconscious attention. Her upper case F was facing backward and she was missing the lower loops of all the letters that should have lower loops. When I asked her to write the letter Yy with attention to the lower loop, the loop she did make was very slanted to the left (the past). Clearly she had some unresolved issues from the past that were impacting her present. She was refreshing in her eagerness to do whatever it takes to reach her goals. Many of my clients say they want things to change but chafe at making changes! Miranda was fine with beginning a daily handwriting practice, incorporating the changes I pointed out.
The downside to "positive thinking" is that people will tell themselves that a difficult situation is behind them and that they're "over it." But all they've done is push their real feelings away so that they "stay positive." Those real feelings of disappointment, grief, anger, etc., carve their initials into the subconscious and tend to become increasingly impactful on our minds and bodies. Dating Coach Jeannine Kaiser calls it, "Slapping a happy-face sticker over it." Miranda could feel the releasing and relaxing effects of the EFT as we tapped on a two-year-old experience.
The other thing we addressed was Miranda's difficulty in allowing her body to relax. A high-energy woman, she's constantly in Go! mode. Generally, when people lie down, they automatically move into a slow, easy diaphragmatic breathing. Even lying down, Miranda's breath was very rapid. We worked for a long time to anchor the therapeutic benefits of slow, rhythmic, diaphragmatic breathing into her body so she could practice it on her own.
Miranda was amazed at how much we packed into our time together and was surprised at how the quickly the minutes flew by. And people wonder why I schedule 90-minute sessions!
Thursday, May 13, 2010
What's In A Name?
This isn't about hypnotherapy, EFT, the Vimala System of Handwriting or any of the usual things I chatter on about in this space. This is about my being Armenian and an old button that gets pushed every so often.
I wasn't born in this country. My immigrant family took great pride in being Armenians in our beloved new home. Growing up, one of the most frequent admonishments I heard was, "Always bring honor to your name!" Because most Armenian names end in "ian," we've always been a rather easily distinguishable minority. I grew up understanding that if I did something wrong, it was a source of shame not only for me and my family, but an entire ethnicity.
Yesterday's The Contra Costa Times had an article about a young woman who was the first to be arrested in a grade-changing scheme on the community college level. Her name was recognizably Armenian and the rush of shame in my body was immediate. I get waves of it when I read the latest craziness one of the Kardashians is involved with. Hearing about all the Armenian gangs in Glendale and the need to have Armenian-speaking jail attendants there makes my blood boil. How dare these people have so little regard for their honor -- my honor!
Okay, Lucy Grace, calm down. I guess this is about my work after all: proof positive of the timeless impact of childhood conditioning. Maybe I should go tap on it ...
I wasn't born in this country. My immigrant family took great pride in being Armenians in our beloved new home. Growing up, one of the most frequent admonishments I heard was, "Always bring honor to your name!" Because most Armenian names end in "ian," we've always been a rather easily distinguishable minority. I grew up understanding that if I did something wrong, it was a source of shame not only for me and my family, but an entire ethnicity.
Yesterday's The Contra Costa Times had an article about a young woman who was the first to be arrested in a grade-changing scheme on the community college level. Her name was recognizably Armenian and the rush of shame in my body was immediate. I get waves of it when I read the latest craziness one of the Kardashians is involved with. Hearing about all the Armenian gangs in Glendale and the need to have Armenian-speaking jail attendants there makes my blood boil. How dare these people have so little regard for their honor -- my honor!
Okay, Lucy Grace, calm down. I guess this is about my work after all: proof positive of the timeless impact of childhood conditioning. Maybe I should go tap on it ...
Doctors as Hypnotists
Dr. Aimee (Eyvazzadeh, http://www.draimee.org/) and I had an email conversation in follow-up to my May e-newsletter column, This is Not What I Signed Up For!
She brought up how hard it is for her when the news she has to deliver to hopeful patients is not the news they want to hear. This was my reply:
How like you to be aware of the important of that moment! Apparently when a patient goes to a doctor for test results, he/she is in what amounts to a hypnotic trance state. What the doctor says in that moment then becomes a hypnotic suggestion. So, HOW a doctor delivers bad news is indeed very impactful. The physician's words, tone and manner have great influence. Just the fact that you genuinely care about your patients as human beings instead of some science experiment makes a difference.
You and I have compared notes on how thoughtless some physicians are in their use of language, and the damage that does – often creating a negative post-hypnotic suggestion for the patient. "Apparently your womb is a war zone." Or "Your body is at war with itself." Yikes!
You can certainly take comfort in the fact that you are unlikely to make the situation worse!
Dr. Aimee is definitely more mindful than many physicians about the impact of her words on patients. In follow-up to our conversation, she decided to change the name she'd been giving to the appointment after test results come in -- from "the debriefing appointment " to "the transitional appointment."
She brought up how hard it is for her when the news she has to deliver to hopeful patients is not the news they want to hear. This was my reply:
How like you to be aware of the important of that moment! Apparently when a patient goes to a doctor for test results, he/she is in what amounts to a hypnotic trance state. What the doctor says in that moment then becomes a hypnotic suggestion. So, HOW a doctor delivers bad news is indeed very impactful. The physician's words, tone and manner have great influence. Just the fact that you genuinely care about your patients as human beings instead of some science experiment makes a difference.
You and I have compared notes on how thoughtless some physicians are in their use of language, and the damage that does – often creating a negative post-hypnotic suggestion for the patient. "Apparently your womb is a war zone." Or "Your body is at war with itself." Yikes!
You can certainly take comfort in the fact that you are unlikely to make the situation worse!
Dr. Aimee is definitely more mindful than many physicians about the impact of her words on patients. In follow-up to our conversation, she decided to change the name she'd been giving to the appointment after test results come in -- from "the debriefing appointment " to "the transitional appointment."
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Comment on "This Is Not What I Signed Up For"
This was sent via email from S., a cherished newsletter reader:
[Your May newsletter column] helped me see how a big disappointment had
manifested without my understanding it as such. Your suggestions are excellent,
ending with a gratitude practice which I closely follow each evening, each day,
and hopefully each moment. A good book resource is "Living Life as a Thank You"
by Nina Lesowitz and Mary Beth Sammons. It's not well edited. They stretched
it out too much, but the beginning part gives lots of resource websites.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Huffington Post article of interest
Check out Maddy Dychtwald's insightful comment about family redefined in her most recent Huffington Post blog on How J. Lo's Screaming Orgasm Redefines Family at http://huffingtonpost.com/maddy-dychtwald/
The unprecedented stress on families is showing up not only in the adults but the children -- especially teenagers. Home is not a peaceful place for too many of our kids. Chronic anxiety is generating insomnia, panic attacks and specific anxiety (such as test anxiety) in many of the teenagers coming to me for help. Our kids are very stressed out and have even less emotional maturity to deal with their stress as their stressed-out adult family members.
The unprecedented stress on families is showing up not only in the adults but the children -- especially teenagers. Home is not a peaceful place for too many of our kids. Chronic anxiety is generating insomnia, panic attacks and specific anxiety (such as test anxiety) in many of the teenagers coming to me for help. Our kids are very stressed out and have even less emotional maturity to deal with their stress as their stressed-out adult family members.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
What are the odds?
The new client was very late and discomfitted by his lateness. After filling out his paperwork, he finally relaxed enough to look around my inner office. "Oh," he said, looking at the Tree of Life tapestry behind my chair, "I have that same thing. Got it in Oregon." Then we both said, "Ashland," at the same time.
What are the odds?
What are the odds?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
